The Real Housewives of New Jersey relationship expert Siggy Flicker is giving some good advice on how important real, human contact is in the digital age.
“Everybody’s used to social media, so we’re used to getting everything we want right away, and I stress to everybody, online dating is fabulous, fabulous, but you can’t get…it’s like a scale,” she explains. “You can’t get used to looking at somebody behind a screen…because you can meet somebody and he can be tall, dark and handsome, and great and amazing and successful, and then you meet him in person, and he treats the waitress like a piece of s**t. Then you know, this person doesn’t have character, doesn’t have soul, this is not who I want to spend my life with.” Siggy, who married for the second time in 2012 to car salesman Michael Campanella, says that she wouldn’t have looked twice at her husband if his dating profile described him as “balding on top,” and listed his career.
“When I first got divorced, I was going on dates and I would have never met my husband if I was looking at a dating profile and it said, losing hair on top of his head, selling Jeep Cherokees,” she says. “To me, when I met Michael, my heart was pounding. I couldn’t wait to see him again. I loved the way he looked at me and he asked me questions and he was so humble and I remember dropping my credit card and he bent down and I just saw such a class act.”
Siggy says meeting him in person was what sealed the deal, and says online dating isn’t always the way to go.
“I was infatuated from day one with him. Dating online is not the best way to go,” she says. “It’s a great option, but there is nothing like stop looking at your phone, stop doing this, because this is all my kids do, this is all I do, and how about you look up and you make contact with somebody. And if you see something you like, you say, excuse me I love your tie, I love your glasses, you have a great smile. It’s that human interaction that we’re all missing. I tell all my clients get out there and look people in the eye, you can tell so much about someone by looking in their eyes. And the most important thing is to find somebody who has compassion, who has a soul, because life isn’t easy. That’s why I love the Jersey housewives. You have ups, you have downs, life is not a box of chocolates. But you want to be with somebody who’s going to get through the bad times as well as the good times and that you can’t determine off a piece of paper or a profile. You gotta get out there and look up.”
Good advice, Siggy.
-Reporting by Jocelyn Vena